Do I have the right to seek help?

     One of the hurtles in healing from a past abortion is overcoming the stigmatism related to the act itself, and the dangerous belief that you deserve any misery you may have afterwards.  There is often an unspoken, even consciously unrecognized, belief that if you choose abortion, you don't have the right to need or seek help afterwards concerning the abortion.  As if, you asked for the pain and sorrow and other symptoms that often accompany this choice, by making the choice to have an abortion in the first place.  If you are the post-abortive woman, you have no problem at all saying to yourself, "you did this, you deserve to have these horrible symptoms the rest of your life to atone for what you did."  But having symptoms and needing help after an abortion are completely natural and normal occurrences, and you have just as much right to need and seek help as anyone else who is in pain in this world.
     Many, many women have great regret and emotional pain and symptomatology following an abortion decision, especially if they did not want to have an abortion, but felt there was no other way to proceed in their lives, or were forced to have it by someone else, such as a boyfriend, parent or other guardian.  Often a woman experiences great emotional pain following the termination of one or more pregnancies, if she feels that she has violated her own moral code of conduct, that is if she feels she went against the very core of her own beliefs about life and nature and what being a woman and mother means in this world.  Women in these types of situations can spiral silently behind the scenes, and be devastated emotionally and psychologically, while trying to "keep it together" and attempt to function normally for others in their day to day lives.  This type of coping works for a while, but usually eventually wears out, as she struggles to perform day after day in this life that she knows is just for show.  These women will often present for therapy as "depressed" or "anxious" as these are more "acceptable" diagnoses, but all the while they have a secret, they are suffering silently and need profound help.  
     The good news is, there is help out there, and as women and men become more and more vocal about the pain of abortion, and society begins to recognize it's less about the choice and more about the person, we will see help for the post-abortive becoming more and more necessary and in demand, and more readily available in our counseling offices.
     If you are hurting from an abortion and feel you need help, I would implore you to seek it.  Try a therapist, if you don't feel they can hear you or understand your pain, try a different therapist, and keep trying until you have found someone you can process your thoughts and emotions with.  Someone who understands you as a post-abortive woman and understands your pain.  You must talk with someone you feel you can trust, or it will be difficult for you to make progress.  You need to walk this path with someone who is trained in this delicate type of need, someone who understands the devastation of Post-Abortion Syndrome and most importantly, knows the way out of it.  Don't be afraid to ask if the person you are speaking with knows how to help you.  It is your right to seek help if you need it, and it is your right to receive the help that you need.  You must be your own advocate, in seeking this specialized type of care, and in not giving up until your need is fully met.  My prayers are with you as seek to find that which you need.